Saturday, January 06, 2007

Other PBS Promises For You, The Viewer

Be more.  Inactive.

Be more.  Seated.

Be more.  Pledgy.

Be more.  Sedentary.

Be more.  Home.

Be more.  Earnest.

Least Performed Gospel Songs (2006)

 Don't Forget Jesus (In The Morning)

(I Can Hear This Song In The Air) The Sound Of People Singing

The Preaching And The Teaching (Of The Lord)

Let Your Pants Get To Kneelin' (And Rejoicin')

Will The Almighty Come Home Today? (Or Will He Pass On By?)

We All Sing And Shout A Whole Lot (In His Name)

(If The Lord Don't Look Upon You With Grace) Then Keep On A-Singing

With My Faith (I Shall Not Smite You)

Seven Little-Used Keys

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My Love For You Is Like . . .

. . . a birthday cake with only blue candles.

. . . winning the Boston Marathon and not being terribly thirsty at the end.

. . . freshly baked zucchini bread on a somewhat cool fall morning.

. . . the whiff of Dr. Pepper when pouring into a glass.

. . . plucking the pills of wool from my sweater.

. . . the first inhalation after blowing my nose in the morning.

. . . new batteries in my cordless mouse.

. . . a day without mail from Capital One.

. . . a poem, but a good one, and not too metaphorical. 

Great Regionalist Paintings From My Apartment Complex

Me & My Garden Vegetables

A View From The Patio

Untitled Still Life No. 6

Children In The Neighborhood Park

Charlie The Cat With Yarn

Portrait In Sweatpants

La Guerre

Cozy Time
 

Thursday, January 04, 2007

Legislation From the 110th Congress' First 100 Seconds

replaced coffee vending machine with Rancilio espresso machine

to avoid national holidays, moved the Monday lobster menu in commissary to Friday

upgraded in-dash Lincoln Town Car television monitors from LCD to plasma

raised minimum wage to $12.75

cut Congressional staff allowance by 50% in favor of unpaid interns

Wednesday, January 03, 2007

Best Televsion Programs of 2006 ('Reality' Category)

10. Waiter, There's A Finger In My Soup

9. The Ironically Detached Nightly News Report

8.  Make Me Rich With Money And Prizes!

7.  HBO Presents: Celebrity Expletive

6. Challenge-Off Competitive Contest

5. The Real-Life Concierge Files

4. Forensic Flight Attendant

3. Embedded Water Boy: Gaza

2. Nokia Presents 2.0 Megapixel Cell Phone Camera Scandal Capture

1. Behind The Game Show